My children do beautiful things

I have good news.  The arthritis panel came back negative yesterday.  I cried.  I cried because for what seemed like the first time in so long things were going right.  What I have is manageable and my future is a positive one.

I also treated the diagnosis as postive, to be honest.  I have been on a cloud-skimming high since about last Thursday.  (It took me a couple days to fully swallow and digest living with Fibromyalgia.)  But TO KNOW!!  To be able to say, "This ache is the disease, I don't need physical therapy, I need to accept it and work through the pain" and "I am not crazy!  This pain is real and I can embrace it and be happy I can feel anything at all!" - those are the kind of emotions the diagnosis settled in my heart.

So today I share this good news.  And I share something beautiful done for me.

I had my first case of utter exhaustion to the point of inactivity last night (first non-child related, for all you parents out there!).  I wasn't able to go to my Junior League volunteer event.  I was barely able to fork spaghetti into my mouth and run to the pharmacy.  I collapsed into bed and fell asleep before my husband, which he will attest is about the fifth time this has happened in seven years of marriage.

This morning, my whole body ached.  My joints hurt with sharp, knifelike pain.  I felt feverish and worried that I was getting sick, but I really knew it was just the exhaustion and accompanying fibro symptoms.  (Read here for assurance that I know to separate what is and what isn't fibro-related.)  My mood, of course, went straight the farthest point south and I wasn't sure I would be able to function, let alone take care of my children.

And then we got in the car.  My son, Jake (4yo), made an absolutely ridiculous pose and said, "Look at me, Mom!" and my daughter, Natalaie (21mo), copied him and screamed, "Look at me!"  Immediately the negative reverie was broken and their precious voices began to sing out in my heart.  We turned on music and had a wonderful, stress-free (that's relative, as moms will know) ride to school.

So my children did something beautiful for me today.  And I am here, writing a positive post instead of the opposite because of it.